"chocolate mess"
... and it means exactly what you think it means. thus far, my favorite phrase that i've learned since i've been in Texas.
its a chocolate mess in bakersfield. that's what "HW" would call it. just real fuckin shitty shit storm down there in b town.
that must be why i'm getting a visit from Ma - right after my gramma passes...
see ya soon with pictures - and try to watch purple rain again cause it's AWESOME!
peace.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
what's next??? 2009-10-10
i just haven't been interested in writing for quite some time - i just don't find that i have anything to contribute. besides this computer is not the ideal for doing anything as it sucks bawls, most of the time i just sit and watch the green bars load incredibly slowly.
at first it goes quickly, up to 2 bars. then it stops, and half an hour later the rest of the bars fill in.
it's so fuckin annoying.
plus half of the time i hit my elbows on the kitchen table.
aside from that - me, being the genious that i am - zip tied everything in back of the computer so that the mouse has a confined space that goes ... oh about 3 centimeters from the monitor.
(WHINE, WHINE, WHINE - i know)
i'm just sayin' - but as the 31st yr of my existence rolls around i am really starting to feel that i desperately need to do some kind of exercise so my bones don't cease up and my fluidity turns to a long forgotten memory. my knees pop, back hurts, and i cant' see shit at night. moving on.
--------------------------------
I really love my crazy wife, i really love my rambunctious son. i really love my life, i just wish i loved my job.
but is there anything to love if you just show up for the paycheck, in this line of work there's only one motto: "just show up everyday, on time." my friend megan has been doing something fulfilling and worthwhile for most of her "career oriented life" but those jobs are tough to get paid at. while other jobs that just kick your ass tend to pay more, but you really fucking hate it.
i often soon hope to stumble into to something that would pay me decent money and also be a hoot to work at.
maybe that will happen at Merrill Lynch, but i doubt it > seems to be more of the same but i plan to put on my best shit eatin grin. just right now it's a bad time for people in the financial sector looking for a paycheck - i am very nervous about this move, but i feel that i am justified because every sector of this industry is left to stand on corrupt stilts that high paid CEOs have established.
so it doesn't matter if i stay w/ whomever b/c every company is in the same situation... totally and absolutely fucked - just one may be less fucked than another the difference is minuscule.
----------------------------------
i'm not really such a bitter dude, it's just i've got a lot on my mind right now - apparently my extended family will soon tear each other apart. THANK GOD i'm way out here (TX) and they're way out in CA.
while i was out there we were able to get away to show Evan the ocean (TWICE, as the first time our camera went dead). we have some great pictures!!
at first it goes quickly, up to 2 bars. then it stops, and half an hour later the rest of the bars fill in.
it's so fuckin annoying.
plus half of the time i hit my elbows on the kitchen table.
aside from that - me, being the genious that i am - zip tied everything in back of the computer so that the mouse has a confined space that goes ... oh about 3 centimeters from the monitor.
(WHINE, WHINE, WHINE - i know)
i'm just sayin' - but as the 31st yr of my existence rolls around i am really starting to feel that i desperately need to do some kind of exercise so my bones don't cease up and my fluidity turns to a long forgotten memory. my knees pop, back hurts, and i cant' see shit at night. moving on.
--------------------------------
I really love my crazy wife, i really love my rambunctious son. i really love my life, i just wish i loved my job.
but is there anything to love if you just show up for the paycheck, in this line of work there's only one motto: "just show up everyday, on time." my friend megan has been doing something fulfilling and worthwhile for most of her "career oriented life" but those jobs are tough to get paid at. while other jobs that just kick your ass tend to pay more, but you really fucking hate it.
i often soon hope to stumble into to something that would pay me decent money and also be a hoot to work at.
maybe that will happen at Merrill Lynch, but i doubt it > seems to be more of the same but i plan to put on my best shit eatin grin. just right now it's a bad time for people in the financial sector looking for a paycheck - i am very nervous about this move, but i feel that i am justified because every sector of this industry is left to stand on corrupt stilts that high paid CEOs have established.
so it doesn't matter if i stay w/ whomever b/c every company is in the same situation... totally and absolutely fucked - just one may be less fucked than another the difference is minuscule.
----------------------------------
i'm not really such a bitter dude, it's just i've got a lot on my mind right now - apparently my extended family will soon tear each other apart. THANK GOD i'm way out here (TX) and they're way out in CA.
while i was out there we were able to get away to show Evan the ocean (TWICE, as the first time our camera went dead). we have some great pictures!! 
The flight out there was incredibly smooth - Evan was an absolute PEACH!!
i suppose that'll be it for now - this damn computer is getting on my nerves. hopefully we'll get move some things around in this apt or get some stuff for this computer that makes it faster.
or maybe i'll just go to public libraries and post.
****************
here's a quick rundown of things going on:
1) Sarah has been ROCKING in the kitchen as almost every night she cooks something great.
2) Evan has now found out how funny and cute he is so he smiles and laughs hysterically at himself quite a bit.
3) we did not qualify for a townhome recently so we decided to extend our apt lease for a year (it was the most affordable option).
4) Morgan Stanley has been kickin my ass lately as i work for a couple very demanding people and ... the entire branch office.
5) Merrill Lynch threw a bunch of money at me to go over there and do a hell of a lot less, by
working for only 1 very demanding person.
6) My brother and I have buried that hatchet and we are brothers again, and not people who have to put up with each other because we're family. hopefully this lasts.
7) Sarah and I are in need of planning a budget and sticking to it, as we recently had our asses kicked this month. we vow to not let finances kick our ass again.
8) Evan can pull himself up on just about anything, but then he falls head first in the direction that his head tends to drift.
9) my big crazy family will prolly divide into three of four separate tribes/clans in the following months as my grandmother waves goodbye to be w/ my grandpa... eternally. it's a very strange and sordid affair in this quagmire called Bakersfield, CA.
10) i need to sell my maxima, but i like the car so much when it runs like a champ - but it will cost quite a pretty penny to get it to run like that again. we are trying to sell "Darla" my (and Tony H's) first major purchase in college. She's a 27" Sony Trinitron.
11) and we need to get rid of some cats, because --- i hate them. and they are filthy, everything is cat poop or cat vomit or cat hair. Evan is stuck to playing in his pack and play or on the blanket in his room.
12) cats can't help but to stick their hairy face in water cups and spill shit everywhere on everything. hate. those. damn. cats.
i can't think of anything else, except those effin' cats now.
or maybe i'll just go to public libraries and post.
****************
here's a quick rundown of things going on:
1) Sarah has been ROCKING in the kitchen as almost every night she cooks something great.
2) Evan has now found out how funny and cute he is so he smiles and laughs hysterically at himself quite a bit.
3) we did not qualify for a townhome recently so we decided to extend our apt lease for a year (it was the most affordable option).
4) Morgan Stanley has been kickin my ass lately as i work for a couple very demanding people and ... the entire branch office.
5) Merrill Lynch threw a bunch of money at me to go over there and do a hell of a lot less, by
working for only 1 very demanding person.
6) My brother and I have buried that hatchet and we are brothers again, and not people who have to put up with each other because we're family. hopefully this lasts.
7) Sarah and I are in need of planning a budget and sticking to it, as we recently had our asses kicked this month. we vow to not let finances kick our ass again.
8) Evan can pull himself up on just about anything, but then he falls head first in the direction that his head tends to drift.
9) my big crazy family will prolly divide into three of four separate tribes/clans in the following months as my grandmother waves goodbye to be w/ my grandpa... eternally. it's a very strange and sordid affair in this quagmire called Bakersfield, CA.
10) i need to sell my maxima, but i like the car so much when it runs like a champ - but it will cost quite a pretty penny to get it to run like that again. we are trying to sell "Darla" my (and Tony H's) first major purchase in college. She's a 27" Sony Trinitron.
11) and we need to get rid of some cats, because --- i hate them. and they are filthy, everything is cat poop or cat vomit or cat hair. Evan is stuck to playing in his pack and play or on the blanket in his room.
12) cats can't help but to stick their hairy face in water cups and spill shit everywhere on everything. hate. those. damn. cats.
i can't think of anything else, except those effin' cats now.
13) Looking forward to hanGHing with the cousins out here in ATX!!!
(i got one of these kids hulk hands, guess which one...)
14) lastly - going to BW3's for birfphday lunch today, man i need to eat a salad b/c i was hurtin fer certain last night (2 times) around 2AM and 4AM. explosive. however, i cannot resist the temptation of some potentially great and volcanic buff wings.---
recent film: no end in sight - it's what we all knew about the war on Iraq. those who had enough sense to pay attention that is. no need to watch it unless you like to belabor the point that we have absolutely no direction or leadership in the white house and we haven't had it in about 8 years. gotta love family values doctrines from politicians, and then sending YOUR family our to police a country that's been delivered to hell and now resorts to unrest in numerous militant factions.
music: Lil Wayne - i'm intrigued to be honest. how did i get here? but it's what i've been into now. amilli.
lates - DNG.
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